When did men and women stop needing each other as friends?

Hey there, so this is a post with a serious question.

One of the things I am grateful for is having had male friends who like me are also single.  Being single can be hard for some and for me it has been fun.  However, I do enjoy having a male friend that I can go to a sporting event, concert, dinner or invite to be my +1 to a work event, or have me make a car repair or car buying decision.  

Luckily with that said, I am fortunate that I have married friends who I am friends with both the wife and husband and sometimes I actually have more in common with the husband.  I am even extremely lucky when their relationship is established on trust and that trust is extended to me and the wife does not think twice about me and the husband going to a sporting event as well as always makes sure I know I can count on them for help.  

With that said it is not the same as having a male friend who is also single and you can just call or text and be normal with.  I was fortunate to had that in CA with a long time work acquaintance that we came to refer to each other as work husband / wife.  We would help each other out at work and in our personal life - I would help with making appointments for him and he would help me with advise on car repairs etc. and we would go out to dinner and happy hours.  Then there was my church friend - Dreamy Chris who I really thought was stuckup and self centered as we were in the same stake and had mutual friends but he never really hung around or seemed friendly.  When we finally had the opportunity to establish a friendship I learned my assumption of him was 180 degrees off.  He was so loved by people because of how charitable, kind, caring, and helpful he is.  We would talk about the Gospel, encourage each other, go out to dinner, go to the temple, baseball games, was willing to drive on the 91 at rush hour with me so I could pick up my niece in Moreno Valley so we could see the Twilight Movie at midnight in Buena Park, and was there for me when I had to have a biopsy and was super scared.  So I miss my work husband who still lives in CA and Dreamy Chris who moved to ID a while back.  

When I moved to TX I thought I had at least three possibilities of male friends who could fill in those shoes (they are big shoes to fill) but the reality is so far all three possibilities have not fanned out.  One moved away for work and I am super happy for him; the other travels a lot for work and is rarely in town and while he is very apologetic, I don't think he realizes how sad it makes me that we don't get to do things we talked about doing; and the other I had never met and after we did he apparently didn't think I was worthy of his friendship and that one is the one that has me baffled.  It also makes me wonder if I am that bad of a person.  Just kidding I know I am not because a co worker texted me today and told me what her son said.

So until I get an answer as to why and when single men stop needing single women as a friend I will cling to the words of a young man - "Miss Adriana is so sweet and so nice Mama".

Cicadas....what?!

So I started walking out to my car a few weeks ago and would hear this vibrating like sound.  So I looked for wire lines and there was nothing.  I would look around to see who was making the sound and there would be nobody around.  Also, keep in mind the sound would stop and start in different areas as I walked to my car.

I thought two things:  1.  I was imagining things or 2. there was something strange going on.

Then one morning someone was in the parking lot with me and I asked them if they heard that sound.  To which they promptly responded no and I thought great I am going crazy.  Then they said oh wait, the cicadas?  I said the what?!  

I have learned all I ever wanted to know about them.  They are large insects some grow over 1 ½ inches. Their color varies depending upon their species and many are brown or green.  They have bulging eyes and, on adults, wings that are held roof-like over the body. The wings are semi-transparent with thick wing veins. The majority of their life cycle is spent underground.  They can fly and when they do, they fly like a drunk driver.  When they emerge from the last nymphal stage they leave behind their skin.  Male cicadas are the guilty party for the sound or song they make to attract females.  I don't like it as I feel like a swarm of critters is coming.  Other people love that sound because it is home and it is soothing.

So today someone pointed out one to me or at least the shell - not the best picture but I finally saw a part of a cicada.  At least they told me it was the shell and I would not get very close to take the picture as I was grossed out.

In 7 Days

I will have been in Texas for 182 days or if you prefer 15,724,800 seconds, 262,800 minutes, 4368 hours, 182 days, 26 weeks, or 49.86% of 2018.

I have had fun being here and over all I am much happier.  Yet, lately I have been struggling with being home sick.  I miss the flexibility to get in my car and drive a couple of hours to see my family in Palm Desert, getting Milanesa or Ceviche at Enrique's, riding my bike to or around the beach, going to the movies with Wendy, my monthly dinners with Spencer, David and even sometimes Laura, the ocean smell and just the familiarity of being in a ward where I know people and people know me, I miss my longtime friends.  

OK so enough about that before my eyes need windshield wipers. 

I only have to drive 45 minutes or so to see my friends that have known me the longest and when I am there I feel super happy.  I am super grateful for technology that allows me to see pictures of what is going back home via IG, FB, and texts.  My niece Natalie and my brother Ken will be stopping by for a night on their way from GA to CA and I can't even begin to tell you how much I am looking forward to that.  I have not really been to the movies since January - wait I did see Dirty Dancing but does that count?  Yes, yes it does as I had never seen it, in it's entirety and it was good.  I have had some nice bike rides but now it is so hot and humid and I can't bring myself to go on a bike ride but apparently after 9/15 it should be cooler so I can ride then...ugh.  I do have a great ward it will just take time to make friends.  

So overall even though I do get homesick I do like living in Texas.  Today I was asked if I was going to make it (with the heat) or if I had thought of going back home yet.  I answered honestly  as follows:  I sometimes wonder if I am not going to melt but I have to believe I will make it - I like my life in TX too much to have to drive back to CA and not be happy there. 

There you go my one post in a while and it is a bag of mixed feelings. 

A New Job

Keller Town Hall

I started a new job on February 13, 2018 in TX. 

I applied to various places and was planning to work in the Allen/Plano area and randomly ended up applying for a position in a whole different area.  I had four interviews on the day I interviewed with my new job.  They were not at the top of my list but I figured I would give it a shot.  

I felt that I had blown the interview and lousy on my Excel test but really liked the individuals I met.  So by the time I was done with the interviews that day I was hoping I had not messed up too much but also wasn't sure because it wasn't in my plan.

I got a call the next evening and was offered the position.  I asked to think about it over the weekend and accepted on Monday afternoon.  While it was not in my plan I knew it would be a good opportunity.  

Something is in the Air
a little sculpture that I walk
to sometimes to get energy

I enjoy my commute two miles to and from work.  I work with an amazing group of professional individuals.  We laugh, we talk and we work hard.  It is refreshing.

The view from the back
of Town Hall

I work for the City of Keller as the HR Manager.  It is a great place to work and live in and there is always something going on.  So far I have been able to attend the employee softball tournament, the police officers banquet, I have seen the Easter Bunny at Town Hall, watched election signs appear overnight all over town hall and people exercising their right to vote by going to early elections and I have some amazing views and places to walk around at lunch time if I so choose.  I almost forgot that Town Hall is where there are rotating art shows.  See the perks I have are endless.

The view from my office
taken while sitting
at my desk on a rainy day.

I also have my own office again.  While I didn't mind sharing an office, my previous office was too small and I did learn to appreciate having my own office.  One thing that is big at Town Hall is that a lot of employees have their diplomas on the wall.  So not to be left out I have joined and display my beautiful diploma frame and my Cal State University Fullerton pride.  

Sometimes I am sad my plan didn't quite work out the way I had planned - meaning about working and living in the Plano/Allen area.  Then I remember, I am not in charge but someone else is and there is something I need to do for him here.  What that is, I don't know but I can't wait to see what happens and how well I do.  After all, as long as I go with the flow and trust in him, I will do great.  I mean look at how my move to TX worked out once I made the decision to do it.  

 

The Easter Bunny visits Town Hall

Early election and the signs I saw as I drove
 to the employee parking lot of Town Hall.

The End of a Decade

The day I received my 10 year'
award in April 2017

I started working for LISI Aerospace on February 5, 2007.  I imagined I would be there 4 - 5 years at the most and boy was I ever wrong.  3,965 days later(that would be 10 years, 10 months and 8 days) I walked out of LISI Aerospace at 2600 Skypark Drive for the last time as an employee.  

This was the original HR team only
KGS remains with the new team.

I started at LISI as a Senior HR Generalist and was promoted to a Senior Benefits Specialist in May of that year.  Prior to that LISI acquired a company in Escondido, CA and while I was asked if I was interested in a transfer to that facility.  I declined as I explained I was not interested as I had no intentions of ever moving outside of Orange County.  

Fires were an adventure
I dealt with working at
Escondido.  Along with
gas lines being hit and
having to evacuate.

In the fall of 2010, I was bored and getting ready to make a change.  I thought of moving to TX but it just wasn't the right time.  I was ready to move to San Diego.  So I went to work for the Medical division of LISI from January 2011 through May 2015.  I learned a lot about Health Safety and Environment there.  I learned and implemented ISO14001 and then OHSAS18001.  However, the HSE responsibilities were not what I wanted and I needed a change and again an opportunity at LISI Aerospace allowed me the opportunity to transfer back to Torrance.

While I was enjoying my time there I also knew I needed a change as I was not happy doing a 23 mile commute in 70 minutes on a good day.  So when the opportunity came to end my time there I took it and I was good with it.  I have chosen to remember the best memories of working there and I came across this text from an e-mail. 

OK so I am leaving for the day and here is my message; btw I am coming but I may not make that 11:30 timeline. Debby is being kind enough to give me a ride from the auto shop where my car will be so I can attend and Richard said I have to go. Hope my message is not too long and I really did shorten it because how can I sum up working with her the past six years. Thinking about this really made me think wow she put a good group together.

As you have put our HR team together to prepare us for this day we have had our share of laughs as we celebrated milestones in our personal and professional lives; tears as we saw people leave; delicious meals in your home; and we even managed an early 2 am breakfast to prepare for a long day. For me It has been a privilege to not only work with you but to also learn from you as I watched you push each of us to do our best and continue to learn and grow. You have given me so many opportunities and saying THANK YOU does not seem sufficient. This week when Richard said: “Talking to you this morning was like I was talking to Silvia” brought a big smile to my face and I responded “Thank you, I’ll take that as a compliment” it also made us realize that this day was finally here. Silvia, I look forward to hearing about your new adventure and know you will be successful!  Mazel Tov!!  Adriana

Week Four

Things I forgot from my last post. 

Schools in TX shutdown for the flu.  Apparently if a specific number of students are out ill then they shut down the school.  While I found it odd, I also found it to be genius.  Why spread around the germs?  So I saw a school flu shut down last week.  

I still have not changed my stations on my car radio.  Car insurance is double what it is in CA.  😏

So this week so far:

 Monday - I accepted a job offer for a position with a city.  I already did my drug screen, waiting on the background check results and reference checks. 

I went to try running and while I managed to do almost 2 miles it was painful on my knee.  The Hot Chocolate run is this Saturday and I am nervous.

I also went to see Coco, my first movie of 2018 and I fell walking to my seat.  I was distracted by seeing someone in the seats I purchased and looking at my ticket.  I was so embarrassed.  I also knew that this was a movie I would have seen and loved with my movie buddies Sharon and Wendy.  The most exciting thing to me was when we were leaving I went to the bathroom and saw that there was Tornado Shelter sign on the women's bathroom door but not the men's.  Not sure why that was but interesting.   

Tuesday - I woke up with a big bruise on my right thigh and my ankle was hurting a lot and my knee was still swollen from running.   So I took the day off.  I did have to go do my drug screen and that was interesting.  I was 10 minutes away and I had to turn around and go back to the house.  Now keep in mind that the place is 50 miles away.  Then I of course had to go back to do the drug screen.  While I was there I learned they had flu shots so I got mine.   Have to make those 200 miles count.  I also treated myself to a brisket sandwich for dinner.  

Wednesday - I somehow deleted what I had previously written last week so I will do my best.  I do know I ran and I did about 1.69 miles in 30 minutes.  I was not happy with my time but I ran a good portion and it could have been worse.  My new shoes did create a nice little blister on my left heel which was just what I needed.  I also found out that they needed volunteers to handout participants bibs and such on Thursday and Friday so I figured that as I am not working why not volunteer.  I thought it would hopefully keep me motivated to be around the positive energy and enthusiasm.  I was also a bit concerned that seeing fit runners would make me want to not participate.  

Thursday - I did see the super fit runners and the not so fit participants so I knew I would be ok.  I had fun overall and was looking forward to volunteering on Friday.  

Friday - I didn't do a whole lot just kind of hung out and got ready for race day.  I went to bed early.  My social life is in almost flatline mode.  


Saturday - I woke up at 4:45 and jumped and took a quick rinse shower to make sure I would be alert on the drive.  I made it to the Texas State Fair Grounds quickly but there was a line to get into the parking lot.  My next line was for the women's bathroom and of course only a few stalls had toilet paper.  Fortunately, I was able to get a stall that had toilet paper.  I then headed to my corral which was G.  I opted to go in the one that allowed you to walk which was corral H.  People were fun and nice.  I tried to find Tammy as she and her daughter were in G but it was crowded and they were in the middle.  I was super excited with my start when I realized I was doing a 15 minute pace.  However, I once again had to stop for the port o potty line.  I can't drink water and be in the cold weather without having to use the bathroom.  I was hopeful it would be semi clean but no such luck - I was disgusted and wanted to toss my cookies.  Oh wait, I had no cookies to toss just the hard boiled eggs I ate.  So off I went but have you tried running when you want to throw up?  So I just never got my pace back to 15 minutes and I stopped to take pictures.  I did finish in 1:00:07 so I hope I can cut my time in half for next year. That night I went back to Lava Cantina to listen to an 80's cover band and had a lot of fun.  We stayed afterwards and danced.  I was home around 1:30 AM.  



Sunday - celebrated M's birthday.  Watched the Super Bowl which was a great game.  I enjoyed seeing the Eagles win.  The best part was watching it with Garth - haven't done that in decades and it just reminded me of those days we'd watch the bowls on New Years Day or Super Bowl.  

Clearly I have fallen behind again on my post but I am hanging in there trying to keep people posted. 

Oh yeah and I did speak with my sil Elaine, Spencer and David this past week.


Also, I don't recall if I shared this picture but a week ago this was the view right outside the front door.  A couple of hot air balloons were out.  
It was so amazing  to see them so close.  Looking forward to the Balloon Festival next fall in Plano I think. 

Week Three in TX - a little late

I knew last Thursday night I needed to start writing and catching up but it was a rather busy week.  I hope this will not be too long and I have to figure out a better way to post. 


Saturday, January 20 - I went to a singles dance and my friend Jon was kind enough to meet me there.  I walked in and saw they were slow dancing to the two step and saw some older people and felt like I was too cool to be there.  I had my snob attitude going full force. and could hear Cindy telling me I was a snob - she's right I can be and I was that night at the dance.  I caught up with JS and we took some pictures and we left.  He had church at 9 AM so he wanted to get home to get ready for bed and I wanted to meet my friend Brandy at Lava Cantina to hear a metal band.  

While I don't consider myself a metal head I do enjoy some metal and the band was good.  I felt more comfortable with the crowd which ranged between young and old.  Brandy is such a great person to know and has such a positive energy about her. 


Monday, January 22 - At the beginning of the week I heard back about my interview from Friday with Samsung.  I really, really liked the team at Samsung but unfortunately it was a one year contract assignment, hourly and significantly less than what I made in CA.  I considered accepting and was closed to saying yes at it could lead to a good future - but I had a moment of clarity to ask about the benefits and when I reviewed the information I saw how contribution for medical coverage was significantly a high amount with a very high deductible.  I also received two calls to go to the next interview phase with two companies and the next day a 3rd company.  So I made the difficult decision to decline the opportunity on Tuesday morning.  I also realized I am by the country as I drove on a couple of country road X CR500 or something like that and loop roads  I love it but I will always need to be near the city as I am a city girl.

Wednesday, January 24 - I had my first second interview of three this week.  So  by now I figured I could take a  break from the hard core job search and applying.  I took it easy by looking at what was coming up as available and applied to a couple as well as learning about the companies I was interviewing with in the coming days.  I was very excited about a job with a city, followed by a manufacturing company, and then an insurance company.  I enjoyed my phone interview with the manufacturing company. and that one took the lead.

Thursday, January 25 - I interviewed with the city and I thought I did a bad interview but was super glad I had the opportunity.  I then rushed over to another interview with the insurance company.  I felt like I did great on that interview but felt that having blown my city interview I probably felt the best and likely job to want was with the manufacturing company.   I came home and was exhausted.  I had promised to take B and J to In-N-Out that night for dinner and made it on time.  We had dinner and went to Target to buy some thank you cards.  

Friday, January 26 - I drove back to the other side of Dallas and had my hair done by Amie.  It was so fun talking with her.  It is funny to think she has grown children and was just a teenager when I met her.  She is Liz's niece.  I then headed over to Celeste and Cody's in Justin to visit.  O was home and we just had fun talking and this little sweet boy made me a quesadilla - such a cutie pie.  It reminded me of the days when my nephew Spencer would say he would make me breakfast.  I then ventured outside and saw their chickens - Cody tried to get me to pet one but I was too much of a chicken.  I went in the trampoline and dang those sensations were too much.  I played with O and we played dead if the ball hit us.  We met the older kids at the park between their house and their school and then I had to rush back to this part of town.  I was going to dinner with B and B and then to the Allen Americans hockey game.  The game was fun but we lost but there was a good fight at the end.   oh and I did get a job offer this evening from the city which I have thought of accepting this weekend.

Saturday, January 27 - went to the Dallas temple with Dave and Liz and that was really nice.  Then went to Torchi's and it was good.  

Sunday, January 28 - gave a talk in church and it went well.  My heart was warmed when I saw Dan and Andi Wood walk in to hear my talk.  I am truly grateful for the friends I have in TX.  Another thing that warmed my heart was being able to speak with Spencer and David.  I love those kids - they are great!!!

Oh and I spoke with a few people on the phone this week aside from Spencer and David.  I spoke with Elaine after a game of phone tag.

I spoke with Lisa.

I spoke with Debby.

I spoke with Wendy

Who did you speak with? 

I still have not set any radio stations in my car.