In my 20's I wanted a hysterectomy so bad. Why? Well I started my period in elementary school and often had to miss a day or two because I was in so much pain and I could barely walk that I just slept. I eventually grew accustomed to the pain or maybe it was the pain killers I took that finally got me to just deal with it.

I knew I did not want to have a baby so I figured; why not a hysterectomy. However that was not realistic.

About four years ago I started having horrible periods again totally unpredictable ( I was never really predictable) and the pain and feeling worn out just came back again. I had a physical and shared with the Nurse Practitioner some of my symptoms. Her response: "Don't worry it is part of getting old, if things get worse we can check into it". I was thinking old? I am in my thirties I am not old; but I figured ok maybe I am. So I endured. Then last spring my physical blood work came back that I was severely anemic. The Physician Assistant called me in and wanted to know how I was feeling what was I doing etc. I didn't think of saying anything about my periods but then I thought why not, things are getting worse. I told her my symptoms and how they had gottten worse. She was surprised to hear that I had been told to not worry and that it was part of getting old. So began my journey.

I increased my iron supplement and had to have a recheck in three months. In the meantime I had moved to San Diego so I opted to stay in my HMO network as my PA seemed to really diligent to doing things right.

When I finally met Dr. Conner I had new hope. My ultrasound showed I had fibroids. I was certain I wanted a hysterectomy and was surprised when she said she wanted to do a diffrent procedure as my iron levels were too low for surgery. So I figured ok she is the professional and I will go with that.

A month later and probably the worst period ever and most humiliating things happening I went back the birth control did not work. I was not scheduled to have a period until December and here in November I had a 3 week period and it was constant heavy.

I went back to my appointment with Doctor Conner and this time she said my iron level was up (finally) and she wanted to get approval from my HMO to do a hysterectomy. I was schocked and surprised. I agreed and so we went.

I was initially scheduled for 12/20/11 but I opted to reschedule for 1/9/12. It was scary but I knew it would be ok.

Do I regret it? No not yet. I had a lot of pain initially and it comes and goes now. However, I tell myself if I don't have to worry about having an accident, feeling worn out, and I am able to have a normal life than it was so worth it!!!!

Living the vida of luxury!!!

The other evening I was talking to my friend Perri who always manages to make me laugh. As I was giving her an update of my days and what I am doing she proceeded to say "Sounds like you are living the life of luxury!!". I had to laugh and say yes, I guess I am.

So I had a few days where all of a sudden I just felt like yuck. Today I felt great when I got up. I did not hurt when I got out of bed and it did not ake a 1/2 hour. I just did it. I was able to watch the 49er game and was sad with the outcome.

Today I woke up at 5 am all on my own and stayed up until 6 or so and then I fell back asleep. I woke back up at 8:30 layed in bed and then got up. I was able to watch the Today show (my new favorite morning show) watched a CSI Las Vegas episode I had not seen. I then thought about continuing to be laze but opted for a shower.

Then I had lunch with my sister in law and walked around the house and tired myself out and took a nap. I walked around listenend to some voice mail messages from 2 weeks ago and laid in bed waiting for dinner.

I got up had dinner watched last weeks episode of Big Bang Theory which I do not think we recorded the final 20 minutes the ending was too odd if we did.

I am ging to bed early since tomorrow is my two week follow up. It will be the first time I have gotten in  a car  in 2 weeks and driven this long, have an appointment 10 - 20 minutes and then back to Palm Desert. Do I regret my choice for this surgery? I don't think so but I definitely did not think it was going to kick my butt like it has.

All day I kept thinking "yes Perri, this is the life of luxury for me. Delicious meals made by my sister in law, family around and my shadow walking behind me (my niece creeped up behind me but because I can't move fast I could not see her) I love her..

11 days later

I guess I should let people know I don't have my phone ringer on and I hardly carry my phone with me.I do this so I can rest and sleep. I appreciate the texts and e-mails but please understand I don't have energy to respond to each text and if I do it is nothing more than a good or thanks. Which is why when I do have energy I blog so everyone can be updated.

I haven't provided daily updates because I have had a couple of days where it hurts to get get up and out of bed. I am not sure why but all of sudden it takes me almost a 1/2 hour to get the courage to get up and endure the pain. My incisions are itching and the right upper one where they did all the work hurts the most. I am grateful that after Wednesday last week I felt great and no pain so I guess I have to have my pain now.

I feel ok otherwise. I am tired of not being able to do things so maybe the pain is a sign that I need to take care of me. So I have slept a lot the last few days.

My sister in law is amazing. I have always admired stay at home mothers. They do so much, make breakfast, lunches, sew buttons, do laundry, fold laundry, clean kitchens, bathrooms, make cookies for meetings, PTO meetings. My sister in law does all that and is now taking care of me. I can't even beging to thank her for all she has done for me the last few days.

This morning I had mail here addressed to Ms. Adriana E and it was from Canada eh! My sister in laws brother Evan lives there her sister Bonnie too. Anyhow Evan has some great kids, Brian, Lori, Erin, Hayley, and Jay. I have been able to get to know their kids and watch them grow. I have spent more time with Brian and Erin but they are all really good kids. We talk on FB ocassionally, mostly Jay and I. I even played the hey do you know Evan A*&$#)DO ( I dont put peoples last names on here sorry) at LAX on my way to France last summer. The man I asked was from Toronto. The lady next to him asked him if hew knew some family and the man said no. I thought let me try and he was like Evan A*&$#)DO yes I do the man that uses the F bomb as a noun, verb , adjective etc. I was like yeap. Turns out he was Melanies cousin. Melanie is married to Evan. Small world huh? Anyhow like all of my sisters siblings this family is very amazing and welcoming to all. So when I got their Get Well card it brought tears of joy. I am blessed to know so many great people in my life and have them as part of my family.

Betty White Off Their Rockers and one week later so many random thoughts.

So I woke up at 5:15 and thought wow a week ago today I was on my way to Orange Coast Memorial. I had yummy chocalate chip pancakes and strawberries.

I took a nap and then took a shower and wow did that feel good.

I did some e-mails. Kept looking at the clock and remembered where I was at that point during the day. At 3ish I remembered I got up and walked around so I did the same thing around that time.

We had a really good dinner - my sister in law is so good not only to me but her family. I have always known how a stay at home mom is an ongoing job. Being with her and having her take care of me has only proved that even more. I am truly blessed that I am here being taken care of by her.
We watched the Betty White Birthday celebration. I hope that I can be a positive influence to others. I have a lot of work to do that. Her new tv show Off Their Rockers was hilarious. when the Golden Girls theme was played at the end I thought I love that song and it rings so true these days. Thank you to all my friends..I have appreciated and valued your friendship.

I enjoyed seeing the Santa Monica Pier, Huntington Beach Pier and then the Buena Park Mall. My first legit job was at Sears at that mall. It is fun to watch a show where you see areas you have lived by and have been a part of your life.

Cupcakes and Golden Globe Awards

Hey I am actually blogging on the day I am blogging about.

I didn't get much sleep last night so  I slept in until 10 or so. I had some oatmeal and watched Make it or Break It with my niece. Yes she hooks me on to some of the most interesting shows.

I then got fully dressed all by myself I have been getting dressed on my own but just wearing nightgown and robe.

My sister in law and I went for a walk to the mailbox. This was the first time I went outside since I left the hospital., walked around Target. It was nice to feel the fresh air and see the outdoors. I also received my EDD confirmation they received my claim and it appears they are going to pay me more than I thought so I have to make sure I don't get paid more than what I earn normally. My company provides salary continuation so anything the state does not pay me they do ensure I have a full check while on my disability. Awesome right? I think so.

I also had mentioned to my sister in law that for some reason I had been craving Sprinkles cupcakes. I don't like cupcakes but I am craving them. So she spoiled me and made me some chocolate cupcakes from scratch. I am truly grateful and blessed that I have such an amazing family.

We had yummy turkey burgers for dinner, pasta salad and roasted cauliflower. I did have a cupcake and it was yuummy even yummier than Sprinkles because it was made to spoil me.

We watched the Golden Glove Awards and that was fun!!

I got anxious all of a sudden and wanted something to do. I was feeling so helpless and tired of not doing anything and just sitting around. So my sister in laws solution was for me to go on my computer. So here I am blogging and on Facebook.

Saturday January 14

Yesterday was ??
I think I went and did too much updating and my brain is dead.

I tried to buy spring training tickets but I couldn't connect to Ticketmaster.

I watched an amazing 49ers game. I thought I was going to have a heart attack but in the end my team one.

A family friend, Susan, came to watch the Broncos game. We ordered pizza and had a 1.5 hour wait for delivery. They delivered after an hour. The game was well the game was heartbreaking but I still think Tebow did a lot of great things for the Broncos this year. He is young and this was a learning experience.

I was so tired and went to bed around 9 or so. I fell asleep for a couple of hours and then woke up cold and then 1/2 my body was hot and the other cold and I felt like I had a huge gas bubble going down my stomach. I don't think I got very much sleep.

I had a chance to talk to Perri and that was fun and welcomed. I don't carry either of my cell's with me but I saw she called and called her back or wait did I happen to walk by the phone when she called. Either way it was nice to hear her voice and catch up on silly but funny things that I knew she would understand.

Friday January 13

Woke up and got up and no pain well maybe just a little.

I slept in and went and had breakfast and prune juice a whole big glass.

The juice did its magic and I napped the afternoon away.

I also started reading a book but fell asleep. I didn't take as much Motrine nor Tylenol/Codeine.

I took another shower and I felt great.

It was an early Friday night for bed. I took some motrine and got myself in bed all by myself.

Thursday January 12

I got up on my own today!! YAY!!!

I walked around and had breakfast a yummy ommelet I think or was that the day before ? I drank some prune juice again.

I even took a shower this day and that felt great. I also forgot to mention I learned and have managed on being able to put on my underwears on my own. YAY!!! No need to ask for help?

I also took long naps today.

I think I even stopped taking pain killers that night.

Drink your prune juice and you can have your drugs - Wednesday January 11

I woke up that morning as I slept through the entire night. I got some help getting up and I was in some pain.

 I had a nice breakfast made by my sister in law and she srved me some prune juice. That morning I still had not had a BM. It was funny when my sister in law said you can't have your pain killers unless you drink your prune juice. Seriously, if I drink it I am being tortured if I don't I am being tortured and kept in pain. I drank the juice and it had some awful taste so I ate some toast quickly afterwards.

I walked around the house and walked and walked. I sat and also took a nap.

That night my other brother and his mom came over. We had a nice family dinner as this was Laura's last night in home.  I sat in the kitchen as the chair there was the best for me.

The worse part about this day is that my sister in law laid down to rest for a little while and when she got up she tweaked it. I felt bad as she had helped me get up that morning and when I took a nap.

The best part was being with my family specifically my nieces they are such sweet girls. Laura helped me get in bed that night. She was very helpuful and concerned about what she should or shouldn't do.

The Drive to Palm Desert January 10

So as I got in the car leaving Fountain Valley at 4:45 pm to go to the 405 South to the 55 North is not easy with rushhour traffic and me on drugs.

We made it and sat in traffic and made it to the carpool lane only to go 10 mph maybe. We once got to 35mph.

We got to a Targe by the Tyler Mall and stopped. I was to walk for 15 minutes. So we decided to fill my prescription and we began our walk around Target. We walked and got some things we needed. We went back to the pharmacy after 30 minutes and my RX was not ready so we walked.

I felt pretty good at this point. When it was ready we then went to check out.

We began our drive out to Palm Desert.

We went on the speed bump lane. My sister in law felt bad but I thought it was funny.

We found our way to a Taco Bell and had some dinner to go and got back on the 60.

The drive was fine but I was tired and sleepy by the time we got to Moreno Valley area.

When I arrived at my families home my nieces were there but  I just said hi and went to bed I was tired.

January 10 Second Day

My nurse during the night shift was Jennifer and the CNA was Maria. They were both very nice and amazingly thoughtful. I learned a lesson about humility and service this day.

I woke up that morning around 5:20 and they took my vitals; it was then that Jennifer let me know that around 6:30 I would be getting my cathether out. I fell asleep and then quickly woke up at 6:15 anticipating the hours. I waited and waited and then Jennifer walked in  and did her thing. It did not hurt a lot but it hurt.

I had some breakfast. I was hesitant in eating as the night before I had some beef broth for dinner but it did not stay down for very long. I had a reaction to the percozet they gave me for the pain. I had a major headache for hours , felt sleepy and nauseas and eventually threw up. Totally forgot to post that on my previous post.

So I had a little big of scrambled eggs, cream of wheat, and a little bit of ham. I got full really quickly and felt things moving in my stomach and that hurt so I did not eat very much.

My nurse during the day was Hazel and CNA was Amalia. They were both nice. Hazel was more serious and quiet. Amalia was more friendly and funny. She was the one who challenged me to walk in the morning.

I was then asked to walk. I saw a map that said people on my floor had to walk 6 times around the floor in one day. Well I was all gunho and walked all 6 times that morning.

During my walk I saw the window cleaner with no fall protection equipment walk from one balcony to another while clinging on to a post. It was scary and I thought "seriously I am on loa and here I am reporting a safety issue".

I also walked a lap with the lady that had been in the pre op area next to me. I recognized her voice and to verify I asked if Dr. Jamieson was her anesthesiologist and she was oh yes the hot one. I was laughing and told her I knew his family and had been praying he would not be my anesthesiologist.

She proceeded to tell me how good he was kind and thorough. I was like oh I am sure he is but kind of weird to have someones family member work on you when you know a lot of their family. Oh yeah. Loan made me say hi to him in the pre op. She thought it was a small world and that we needed to meet and say hi. He was very nice.

I then returned to my room and took a nap. Lunch came and it was yummy macaroni casserole. I haven't had it and it was yummy!!!

Shortly after Dr. Connor came in and we talked. She said everything went well and my fibroids had fibroids. I asked if she took pictures and she said yes and would check my chart. She came back and showed me the pictures from my chart. When I went to return them she said they were mine for my refrigerator. I laughed. She released me so I quickly called Elaine to let her know I was released and to take her time to get me as my luggage was not there etc.

Lisa brought my luggage. I took a short walk and then a nap. I was in pain but waited for the pain killers before I was discharged so I could handle it.

I took a wipe down bath. I was too afraid to shower in the shower and didn't know how long it would take.

I got my drugs, went for a walk got dressed and frustrated when I realized I could not pull up my own underwear. It was that moment when humility hit me and I realize sometimes you will need help from others to do things in life you don't want them to do for you or never imagined you would need such help.

Amalia rolled me down and I got in the van. It was a lot less painful then I thought...maybe it was the Tylenol/Codeine working.

Monday January 9

After spending a relaxing weekend and watching an amazing win by the Denver Broncos; I worke up at 4:25 am on Monday morning. I took a shower and quickly dressed and packed up my weekend bag.

We arrived at the hospital at 5:30 checked in and waited. After paying my copay we were shuttled to the hospital area and waited. I was quickly called in and needed to provide a urine sample but couldn't so I changed into my nightgown.

As they checked my vitals I had a slight temp and rechecked again on both ears and I still had a very low temp that the doctor would be told about when she came in.

The doctor checked in and it was all good she asked how I felt and I said fine so we got the clearence. Then I had to wait for my anesthesiologist. As I laid there waiting I heard Dr. Jamieson introduce himself to the lady in the area next to me..yes I dodged that bullet. Earlier in the weekend a friend had asked if he was going to be my anaesthesiologist..I didn't know and the last thing I wanted was someones family member that I knew from church. Eventually Dr. Lee came in and introduced himself he was funny.

I then got rolled in to the Operating Room it was not what I expected but very big and bright. I don't recall much other than I fell asleep quickly. I woke up and looked around and I was in an area where there was many rooms. I then heard them tell me they were rolling me to my room.

I arrived at my room and I was bed A so I had a roommate.

My roomate was kind of noisy and loud with a potty mouth. I learned she had recently been released from jail. Apparently she was caught shoplifting with her boyfriend that she is in love with and would not give his name up so she served some time. Now that she is out she is back with her babies father because she has been clean for a month and needs to stay clean and her boyfriend just doesn't want that. She was in for a UTI and kidney stones.

I was out of it but annoyed enough but kept falling asleep due to the pain killers.

When I woke up at 3:30 I got up on my own and took a little walk. The nurse was pulling my IV pole so I kept trying to keep up with her. When she said I was walking good and fast I told her she had the pole and I didn't want the IV to be pulled. It was funny and she apologized. So back to bed I went and fell asleep.

When I woke up later Jodie was there and we chatted. A little bit later Debbie and Lisa arived. During the nurse shift change my nurse heard my potty mouth roommate drop the F bomb like every other word and excused herself. Lisa heard and asked if I was ok and did I want to be changed. I said yes I had been trying to figure out how to get a room change without creating a fuss. She caught my nurse Jennifer on her way and Jennifer was already in the process of changing my rooms.

Once I was settled in my room my friends left. I had a peaceful night.

Anxiety for next week

So a week from today around this time I will be in a recovery room recuperating from my surgery. I am torn and even having second thoughts.

We hired a temp to cover for me but she seems slow and this morning had a hard time turning on the computer, finding MS Outlook and remembering where the files where. Mind you I created a binder with print screen with step by step instructions of what needed to be done but I didn't think I had to go to the basics.

So I am in the office area and she is in my office...I am waiting for her to finish doing the one task sending the timecards to the temp agencies by e-mail. So far I have gone on FB and checked peoples status and now I am blogggin lets see how long this takes.

I learned this weekend that the best pj options after my surgery are going to be nightgowns. I don't like nightgowns. I went in search of nightgowns and I could not find any I liked or were modest. I mean really sleeveless who wants to do that when it is not summer. Anyhow my search will continue today after work. Which will be hopefully soon.

I also am not sure what I will wear. Everything I read this weekend says I will not be able to wear my regular clothes for the first few weeks. Seriously? So I am so missing my friend Jane who used to make those tshirt dresses. I would totally have her make me a couple for the recover time.

Tempted of just taking Thursday and Friday off as vacation days. I have a lot to do like maybe pack the clothes I will be able to wear - and ship to my brothers house with all my other stuff. Then I can pack my hospital bag / weekend bag and not have a lot to carry. As well as clean my place. I cleaned it and it was looking good but then this weekend happened. That is one thing I had not thought of...I wont be able to carry anything heavy and where will my huge suitcase go while I am in the hospital. This surgery is really a lot more work than I thought.

I am having a little bit of anxiety and really did not need to be at work today but I came so I could help train the temp on some other things I do but I just don't have the patience or the energy to do it. The clerical side of my job is not that difficult at least not to me or is it and I am just a genius?

So I have shared my anxiety thoughts/feelings and she is still not done. HELP me I am a little worried about her but then again I don't care. Bad attitude huh!!!