Surgery

So my surgery date has been rescheduled to January 9, 2011 at 7:30 am.

I am now having butterflies and mixed feelings. I am also once again an emotional teary eyed girl.

For those of you with whom I have not shared I have been having issues for a couple of years. I told the Nurse Practitioner a little over a year ago my symptoms and she said "It's ok honey, it is part of you getting older but if things change let us know and we will see if there is something wrong".

Silly me accepted it and went on with life. During my physical earlier this year we discovered I was no longer anemic but now severely anemic. We talked about things and I relayed the above conversation along with my symptoms to the Physician Assistant. We tried a new birth control pill, increased my iron intake and agreed to check my iron level in three months.

Three months later I waited to what I thought would give a high iron level and went in for lab work. A few days later I got a call to get in ASAP as my iron numbers were decreasing to a little above 7. How could this be as I was taking iron supplements with each meal...what I finally realized is that my periods were getting worse.

I also finally went to see an OBGYN and immediately was sent to have an ultrasound. I wasn't nervous as I had seen how they show they do them on tv. Surprise first words the technician tells me is that it is an intrusive procedure and if I want to back out I can do so. I was like seriously, good thing nobody told me beforehand. So we did the procedure after a few minutes I was about to say ok you have been down there too long get out but she said she was done.

A few days later I was called and told I had fibroids. kind of big too based on the measurements my friend Perri determined by changing from cm to inches.

During this time my birth control was once again changed. This time I was told I would only have four periods a year. I was also instructed to now take 3 iron supplements each meal. It is a good thing I am using this birth control for period issues and not to avoid pregnancy. Why well my periods have gone from 4 days to a week and half to now three weeks or so. Things just happen randomly too. 

So with all that happening my OBGYN has now gone from recommending an inpatient procedure where she would scrape the fibroids and burn the lining of the uterus; she did not feel comfortable taking me into surgery with an iron level below 9. My iron level tested a couple of weeks ago at 9.3 so she feels that surgery would be a good option. She is concerned that if the fibroids come back and with my history of iron deficiency I will have problems in the future. Also, the treatment with the birth control has clearly not worked so she feels a hystorectomy is the best option. 


How do I feel about this? I was gunho about doing the hysteretomy initially but then she explained to me the risks with my iron level being so low so I talked myself into the other procedure and was happy it would be outpatient and back to work in a few days. So while I am disappointed that I know have a mini vacation coming up I am trying to deal with it.

I have never had surgery so I am scared. I know I am not alone and have never been insecure about being single but I now don't like knowing I am single. Don't worry I am not going to turn into one of those women who feels she needs to get married. If it happens it happens if it doesn't that is ok. I guess I am also learning and accepting that I am a mortal I have a pure knowledge of that but to truly accept it is kind of scary.

So I tried not to be too graphic with details. Some may say I am doing this for attention maybe I am maybe I am not. I am doing this to communicate and will blog more about my feelings what I am thinking so people will know and not ask. Why not ask? Well you can ask but as people try to talk to me about I tend to choke up and tear up which creates a very ackward moment for me. I am so much better at explaining my feeling in writing. So don't worry I am fine just a little scared and dealing with a lot of feelings and emotions.